Feature Article
The Impact of Fathers
Nina Chen, Ph.D., Human Development Specialist, Jackson County, University of Missouri Extension
A study conducted by Michael Lamb of the University
of Michigan found that children (7 to 13-months-old) had
similar reactions to separation from each parent. For
instance, when their father left, the children would cry
or complain just like when their mother left. Other
research results indicate that children seven months to
two years are attached to both mothers and fathers. This
finding reconfirms that fathers play an important role
in helping their children grow.
Research findings consistently reveal that warm and
affectionate fathers not only can help their children
develop positive self-esteem, but also influence the
development of their children’s gender role behavior.
Fathers are significant for both boys and girls. For
instance, boys can learn from their fathers about
growing up as a male, male interests, activities, and
social behavior. Girls can learn from their fathers to
develop a trusting comfortable relationship with men.
Loving fathers also have a positive influence on
achievement in boys and personal adjustment in girls.
Loving fathers who provide limit setting, moral
reasoning, and reasonable and firm guidance without
imposing their will can help promote their children’s
competence. Research on father-child involvement also
shows that fathers are significant for children,
sensitive to children and fathers’ play with children is
different from mothers’.
There are some negative impacts on children when they
experience loss of or infrequent contact with a parent
(usually the father) following parental separation or
divorce. Research finds that the majority of children in
this situation miss their fathers very much. Young
children usually grieve the absent father as if he had
died. The permanent separation or father’s absence may
lead to prolonged grief. In addition, father absence can
have a negative effect on both boys' and girls' social
behavior. Research findings show that children who
experienced father absence were likely to have behavior
problems and didn’t do well in school, particularly in
math and science.
Nonresidential fathers can maintain positive, close
relationships with their children, but it takes some
effort. If you have not been involved much in your
child’s life, start now to spend quality time with your
child. For a divorced and non-residential father, it is
very important to keep regular contacts and spend
quality time with children. Mothers also need to provide
support and encouragement to help build the bond between
a child and a father.
If you only see your children on weekends, try to use
the valuable time to be with your children. Taking a
walk, working on the yard and household chores together,
running errands, talking, and sharing can help your
children learn a lot from you. This can be the best time
for your children because most children would like to
hang around with their fathers and this can be a good
memory for them when they grow up. Some fathers spend
more quality time with their children and develop a
closer relationship with their children after separation
or divorce. Divorced and never-married fathers can still
play an important role to help their children grow as
long as they have regular contacts, provide warmth and
consistent rules and routines, and act as a positive
role model.
Although fathers play an important role in children’s
lives, children can still be healthy and well-adjusted
if there is not a father in their lives. Research has
consistently shown that children with gay and lesbian
parents do as well as children with heterosexual
parents. This suggests that the parent’s gender is not
as important as the quality of parenting. Children who
live with a single mother and have no contact with their
fathers also do well when they receive quality parenting
and educational support, and have adequate financial
resources. For children who do not have contact with
their fathers, support from other male adults, such as
an uncle, grandfather, or family friend can provide a
positive male role model. After-school programs, boys
and girls clubs, and youth programs can be good sources
of support for your children. Reading books about males
who are kind and nurturing also can help.
References:
Acock, A. C., & Demo, D. H. (1994). Family Diversity
and Well-Being. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage
Publications.
Arbuthnot, J. & Gordon, D. (1996). What about the
children: A guide for divorced and divorcing parents.
The Center for Divorced Education.
Lamb, M. (1981). The role of the father in child development. New York: John Wiley.
Patterson, C. J. (2002). Lesbian and gay parenthood. In M. H. Bornstein (Ed.), Handbook of Parenting: Vol. 3, pp. 317-338. Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum.
Last Updated 05/06/2008
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