Parenting Feature Articles
David Schramm, Ph.D., CFLE, schrammdg@missouri.edu, Assistant Professor, State Cooperative Extension Specialist, Human Development and Family Studies, College of Human Environmental Sciences, University of Missouri Extension
Tips to Help Children in a World that is Critical of Body Size
Help your children feel good about themselves, gain positive experiences with healthy food, learn how to deal with teasing and more...
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD, is a growing concern for families in the United States. With the disorder gaining attention it is important for families to understand more about ADHD and ways in which families can work together to make their child with ADHD more successful...more
Parents Should Consider Safety for Back
to School
Before the kids head back to school after their summer breaks, parents should do some homework of their own to make sure the new school year is safe on several fronts, including safeguards against the scorching heat that has settled over Missouri...more
Parents Play Key Role in Decreasing Aggression in Children
There are several things parents can do to insure that their child is neither the bully nor the child who is bullied by another...more
Suggestions for Talking with Children & Teens about Hate and Intolerance
Acknowledge that hate groups
exist and that their messages are threatening.
Keep children and teens away from the scene of hate
demonstrations or events. Find alternative and safe
places to discuss the issues and voice opinions...more
Sugerancias para conversar con Niņos y Adolescentes Sobre Odio e Intolerancia
Discipline: When Children Misbehave
Discipline is always a hot topic with parents. But, when parents separate and/or divorce, the child’s behavior can create great concern...more
Consistency is the Key When Families Separate
How should I discipline my children? According to Kris Jenkins, HES Specialist, Bates County, University of Missouri Extension, “Parents are always interested and concerned about discipline issues. This is especially true during and after separation from the other parent.”..more
Parents can help keep kids safe from Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Parents want their children to be safe and disease free, and they do many things to make sure their children stay healthy. Most parents take their children to get their immunizations, they encourage them to wash their hands and when they get sick, they go to take children to the doctor and get medication. However, when it comes to sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), many parents are not doing enough to make sure their children are safe and healthy...more
Cultural Competency for Kids (and Adults)
Cultural competence is defined as the ability of individuals to work or respond effectively across cultures in a way that acknowledges and respects the culture of another. Culturally competent youth are respectful of the values, beliefs, traditions, and customs of others...more
Making a smooth transition between the summer break and the beginning of school can help children feel good about themselves and help everyone in the family create and maintain a positive outlook about the coming school year. Parents play an important role in helping make this transition a smooth one. Here are some tips to help make this transition more relaxed and enjoyable for everyone...more
Back-to-school time calls for refresher course on bus safety
Some 22 million children nationwide will soon be saying goodbye to summer vacations and heading back to school -- a good time for parents to give a refresher course on school bus safety, a University of Missouri specialist said. Last year 26 students were killed and another 9,000 injured in incidents involving school buses...more
Staying Home Alone: Is your child ready for self-care?
Deciding when a child is capable of staying home alone is a difficult one for any parent. At some point in time, most children will need to stay alone before or after school, during the summer break or while a parent runs an errand. Communicating and working with a child can help him prepare for being alone and thrive while parents are away...more
Keeping Kids Safe from Scary Happenings
Halloween is supposed fun and scary for children, but it is the role of adults to make sure kids are kept safe from truly scary situations. How many times are children told “never take candy from a stranger” or “never go to a strangers home”? For the fun and thrill of it, all rules are broken on Halloween night, making this a great opportunity for families to talk openly about appropriate and safe behavior. As is true in everyday safety procedures, there are steps parents can take to keep their kids safe on Halloween.
Fathers Today – Balancing Work and Family
A father’s active involvement in his family contributes to the strength and stability of that family unit. Paternal involvement has many long-term benefits related to children’s achievement and behavior. However, balancing the dual role of being a father and an employee may be difficult. ...more
Parents should take active role in their teens’ summer employment decisions
With school out for the summer, many young teens will be taking summer jobs — some for the first time — and parents should be involved in their children’s employment decisions, said a University of Missouri safety specialist...more
Cultural Differences in school expectations by Latino parents
Missouri is part of the great national expansion of Hispanic/Latino populations. According to the University of Missouri Office of Social and Economic Analyses regional profiles, the Hispanic population in Missouri nearly doubled from 60,000 to 119,000 between 1990 and 2000...more
Spring Cleaning with Young Children
Spring is the time of year for cleaning. Your young children can help with cleaning tasks, especially when they are members of a team that works together. Such activities help children focus on a task, talk about what needs to be done, and follow through until completion. These experiences can promote a sense of competence and show children that everyone benefits from teamwork. ....more
Help Your Family Grow Stronger
How can family members be strong as a family? Here are some ideas of how you can do this...more
Over 1,000 research studies in the past 50 years show there is a relationship between viewing violence in television programs and movies with aggressive behavior in children, youth, and adults. ...more
Grandparents Raising Grandchildren:Trends and Concerns
Most grandparents that I know, think that their grandchildren are really “grand”. Grandparents have the freedom to love the child and then the child goes back to the parent for discipline and care. However, their has been a trend of more grandparents raising their grandchildren. According to the 2000 Census, over 2.4 million grandparents were the primary caregiver of the grandchild. ...more
Minimize stress and maximize the gifts of the season
During the holidays, parents, who already have much stress in their daily lives, are subject to additional stressors that can take away from what is “supposed to” be a jolly season. Make a decision to take time to slow down. Make time each day for you and your loved ones and your family may experience the benefits of the holiday season...more
Choosing the Right Toy for Your Child
Children need toys just as adults needs tools for their particular jobs because play is often described as the work of children. The national average for the number of toys a child receives during the holiday season is about 12. Most children are satisfied with 3 or 4 new toys. If a child receives too many new toys at once, he may become overwhelmed in deciding what toy to play with. To eliminate some of the frustrations of too many toys, select toys with the child's needs and interests in mind...more
Controlling Spill over from work to home
When working parents are tired and over stressed from work the spill over can influence their interactions with their family. Children are very sensitive to their parents’ moods. Children know when we are upset. They do not understand why and will often assume that they are the problem. Here are some tips to leave the stress at work and avoid spill over...more
Managing a home when everyone works
We all work hard today! With commuting and demands of the job nobody has time or energy for housework. Many couples who share a home have a hard time sharing the tasks required to keep a home running smoothly. Many parents aren’t sure what chores are appropriate for children or how to get children to help out around the house...more
Managing Work and Kids: Discipline for Kids
Research shows that parents who use authoritative parenting along with warmth have children who get along better with their peers, achieve more at school, and act out less than children whose parents are permissive or are authoritarian in their parenting styles...more
“The best thing parents can spend on their children is time, not money" –Anonymous. Anonymous is credited with a great deal of wisdom. This bit of information is backed by current research. A report in the journal Child Development about research conducted with two and three year old children which shows that the quality of time a parent (especially fathers) spends with their children predicts the quality of the child’s language and cognitive development...more
Raising Teenagers: How to Solve Problems with Your Teens
Parents and teens usually don’t see eye-to-eye about everything. Conflict is a normal part of life, but it can be hard for parents and teens to discuss problems. These discussions can be angry and frustrating for both parents and kids. How can parents communicate with teens about problems? ...more
Raising Teenagers: Adolescent Development, or “Is this Normal?”
Is your teenager rebellious and moody? Are you two getting into more fights? Does your teen sleep away the entire morning? These are common changes during the teenage years. One way to understand what’s going on with your teen is to recognize the many changes he or she is going through physically, mentally, and emotionally...more
Raising Teenagers: How to Listen to your Teens
A great way to learn about what is going on with your teenager is to carefully listen to him or her. Although it sounds easy to just listen, effective listening can be a very active process. When teenagers feel that they are really being listened to, they are more likely to communicate their thoughts and feelings...more
Children are affected when a family member dies or a public tragedy occurs. As much as adults would like to shield children from loss we cannot. Adults need to understand children and child development to be able to help children cope with their grief...more
Growing Toward Self Discipline
A formula that answers all of the parenting questions about child discipline does not exist. Children are unique and so are their families. As a result, a discipline strategy that might work with one child may not work with another...more
Raising Siblings: How to Avoid Giving Your Children Labels
Your children are so different – they each have very different talents, skills, and personalities so it can seem natural to give them labels. For example, one child may be the “smart one” or the “artist” or the “troublemaker”. Although it is easy to give your kids labels, they can be hard for children. ...more
Raising Siblings: “How Can I Treat My Kids The Same When They Are So Different?”
Do you ever find it hard to treat your children exactly the same? You’re not alone. “It’s not fair!” is a phrase many parents hear when they treat their children differently. ...more
Raising Siblings: How to Avoid Comparing your Children
Do you worry about your kids fighting? One way parents can work to lessen sibling rivalry and jealousy is to focus on each child’s behavior without comparing him or her to a brother or sister. It can be difficult to avoid comparing children, but it’s worth the effort and is an important step to successfully parenting siblings. ...more
Raising Siblings: How to Help Your Child Become a Big Brother or Sister
Imagine if your husband or wife brought another spouse home and said “Honey, I love you so much, you are so wonderful, that I want to have another spouse just like you to come live with us!” and then was surprised that you were upset. This is sort of how your firstborn child feels when you have a new child...more
Raising Siblings: Common Reactions to Becoming a Big Brother or Sister
By the time you have a second child you already see yourself as a parent. For your firstborn child, however, it is a big change because all of the sudden he or she becomes a big brother or sister! This change can be very difficult for children and many become angry and upset. However, most children also have very positive, warm, and loving feelings about their new brothers and sisters. ...more
Effective and Successful Parenting
Research on successful parenting suggests that being a successful parent means being effective, consistent, active and attentive...more
Building a Friendship with Your Spouse or Partner
Couples who remain good friends throughout life usually find much more enjoyment and satisfaction in their relationships. There are many things couples can do to keep their friendship alive...more
Stress Reduction for a Healthier You
One of the best ways to protect your health is to reduce the unhealthy stress in your life. Research continues to show us that too much stress robs us of sleep, causes us to gain or lose too much ...more
Baby Talk Promotes Language Skills
Enhancing communication and language skills is a very important role for the parent/caregiver, and really quite simple to do. Talking with baby is important! Below are some helpful hints to use with your child during the first two years of life...more
Where do we all want to be on a hot, sunny day but in the water? Children especially love the water this time of year. Adults are responsible for the safety of children. The National Safe Kids Coalition reports that 16% of all deaths in children under the age of 14 are from drowning. ...more
All of us have heard the familiar phrase, "Are we there yet?" from children who are bored from sitting for what they perceive as an endless amount of time in a vehicle, or are so excited about their destination they just can't wait...more
Helping Children Resolve Conflicts
Children, like adults, have disagreements with others from time to time. These conflicts happen with playmates, friends, brothers and sisters...more
Family is the most important influence in a child's life, but television is not far behind. Depending on how it is used, television can have positive or negative effects on children...more
Large and Small Motor Development During Early Childhood
During early childhood, children's body fat decreases, the torso gets larger to accommodate organs and the spine straightens, allowing for posture and balance to improve.... The sequence of these achievements is similar in groups of children, the rate of growth and development is what varies by individual....more
Large and Small Motor Development in the First Two Years
During the first 2 years of life, babies grow and develop in many ways. ...The sequence of these achievements is similar in groups of children, the rate of growth and development is what varies by individual....more
Everyday we are faced with trying situations. Sometimes these situations make us angry. One study found that some people got mad an average of six times a day and another study of parents found that two-thirds of the group shouted or screamed at their children an average of five times a week...more
Researchers believe that a combination of traits makes a family strong rather than just one single characteristic. Strengths come from how family members interact with each other, how they treat one another, and what families do as a group and as individuals to support the adults and children in the family...more
Many parents are concerned about teaching their children responsibility. Children learn best by example. The following actions set good examples to learn by...more
If I Had Parenting to Do Over Again
How would I parent my children, if I could have a fresh start? Diane Loomans' famous poem brings lots of ideas to mind, "more hikes and kites, more hugging and less tugging, and model the power of love"...more
How Does One Create a Long Lasting Marriage?
June is a month for weddings and a time for reflection on one's own marriage relationship. Marriage continues to be an important goal for Americans. In fact, over 90 percent of adults will get married at least once in their lifetime...more
Homework: Too Much or Not Enough
The mothers in my office do not look forward to the starting of school because of the busy balance of homework, music lessons, other after-school activities, and sports activities. But as students head back to school it is definitely time to think about homework...more
Ordinary Magic: Families that Beat the Odds
What makes one family recover from great tragedy and another come apart? What strengths does a parent find that cares for a disabled child and nurtures her abilities? Why do some children living in dangerous neighborhoods thrive in school while others are drawn to hopelessness...more
In a recent report it was estimated that about 17 million children and teens between 12-17 years of age were on the Internet. This represents about 75% of all the young people in the United States. With so many young people online it is important to think about some of the safety issues. Here are some frequently asked questions...more
Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
Many people think of grandparenting as visiting with grandchildren, doing fun things with grandchildren, and providing temporary childcare for grandchildren. Most adults do not anticipate taking on the role of primary caregiver for their grandchildren. However, a growing number of grandparents have primary responsibility for raising their grandchildren...more
During the summer months, children have lots of unstructured time and parents or grandparents may have more time with children. Adults can enhance children's development while building a store of great memories by planning fun and stimulating summer activities. Here are a few ideas that don't cost much money. The key ingredient is an adult who is willing to spend TIME with children....more
Having family meals together is important for several reasons...more
Guiding children involves many tasks. Parents are responsible for identifying and enforcing reasonable limits, while gradually giving freedom to children by encouraging them to be responsible for themselves. A positive approach helps teach young children coping skills and self-control while discouraging inappropriate behavior...more
Learning is Child's Play--Light the Lamp of Wonder
As parents, we want our children to do well in school. But how can we help make this happen? One of the best ways is to turn your children into "active learners." As part of your daily family routine, you can make learning interesting, fun and a natural part of your child's life...more
Encouraging kindness in children is an important responsibility for all adults who care for children. You can help children show kindness toward others and experience the positive feelings that grow out of kind and caring behavior...more
A child is born with a unique set of personality traits that are consistent throughout life. Parents are responsible for understanding these traits. Understanding a child helps parents guide and nurture the child as he/she grows...more
Is it necessary to buy popular or famous brands of dresses, shoes, toys, etc. for your children?... more
Many young children go through a biting phase that is troubling to parents. Time usually solves the problem, although there are things parents can do to help prevent and solve this problem...more
Mealtimes sometimes become battlegrounds when parents insist that children clean their plates or finish all of their peas. Mealtimes are an opportunity to share time together as a family...more
Learning to use the potty is a big event in the lives of preschool children. Learning is a full-time job for children at this age, and learning to use the potty may not be as important as learning to climb, jump, run, and talk. Children learn this new skill at individual times of readiness...more
Physical Development: Infancy through Preschool
Physical development takes place quickly in the lives of children. The infant who was once immobile turns into the toddler who seems to be always on the move. Children differ in how quickly they develop large motor skills. This development occurs in stages, each one building upon the previous ones...more
Helping Children Build Self-Esteem
Children's self-esteem may be thought of as a collection of pictures they carry with them that reflects how they feel about themselves. Children begin developing this collection early in life, and parents have a great influence on how they come to view themselves. Children who grow up with a healthy self-esteem have parents who believe in them and give them opportunities to succeed...more
Book Review:
The Heart of Parenting: Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
Gottman's book, The Heart of Parenting, offers valuable guidance and research-based information to adults who parent, care for, and educate children...more
How Are Children Affected By Living in Violent Homes?
The single strongest way to predict child abuse is to find out if there is domestic violence in a home. According to the U.S. Department of Justice, the rate of child abuse is six to fifteen times higher in families where there is adult domestic violence compared the families where there is no domestic violence. Anytime a parent is involved in domestic violence, the children in the home are affected in both obvious and subtle ways because they anticipate, see, hear, fear, and sense the violence...more
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